Freak out!

My mom and I went to lunch yesterday and during the conversation we talked about some things that scare us/freak us out. I started thinking about it more and realized there are some strange things that are on my list. Here are some:

Birds- I'm fine if it's someones cute pet bird that's walking around or sitting in it's cage. I'm even ok if birds are near me when I'm outside. But as soon as there is a bird flying above my head I freak out. I am sooooo scared that the stupid thing is going to poop on me that I have actually ran to avoid being under it just in case it decides to relieve itself. I am also petrified of the bird flu.

Homeless people- Usually homeless people are ok and keep to themselves. I do have a heart and I feel bad for them, but lately I've heard some crazy stories! And the ones in Seattle are aggressive! Brent had one come into his work about a month ago and started stealing all the cookies that are there for clients. When Brent's co-worker asked him to stop he started screaming about all this stuff that has been going on for "Millions and billions of years!!!!" and yelling the f-word. One also walked up to my little sister in downtown Seattle, looked her square in the eye and said, "I'm going to slap you in your f'ing face b-----". So I try to steer clear of homeless people now.

Relief Society- I know, I know, it's CHURCH. Still, there is just something about going to Relief Society where I don't know anyone and sitting for 45 minutes without Brent there with me that makes me soooo anxious! For the first two hours in church I'm fine but when it's time to go to Relief Society I start sweating and my mouth gets dry and I go from a happy girl to a mute. I try to sit in the very back behind someone that's tall and countdown the minutes until I'm outta there!

Breast feeding- I've had lots of people tell me, "Oh when you're a mom it will be DIFFERENT." and "It's natural!". No, no, no and NO! It freaks me out to no end. Seriously, I love babies but I cannot think about where they are getting their food source without my knees getting shaky and my stomach churning. It might be not be natural, but I don't care. My babies are getting the bottle.

Toxoplasmosis- I read in my 'What to Expect when you are Expecting' (no I am not pregnant, I just have the book so I know what I'm in for once I do get knocked up) that you can get this disease from cleaning up kitty litter. I'm sure that since I've been around cats all my life that if I was going to get it, I have by now. Still, that doesn't stop me from holding my breath for as long as I can when I clean the litter box. I've gotten it down to where I breathe three times MAX when I clean it out. And I am sooo looking forward to getting out of litter box duty for 9 months when I'm preggers.

Mole People- Chances are these people don't exist. Still, that doesn't mean that when I go to New York for my sisters graduation in May that I won't be peeking down grates in the sidewalk looking.

Volcanoes- When I was younger I was scared of Mount Rainier (I don't know why, the way it looked freaked me out for some reason). I've gotten over that, but recently I had a dream that I was up at Mount Baker and it erupted and a giant piece of flaming lava rock fell on our Honda. So now when I see that mountain in real life I'm a little wary and I'm pretty sure we won't be taking any Sunday drives up there any time soon.

Deep Water- I'm fine when I'm in a lake and I can't see the bottom, but I hate deep ends of swimming pools. I have dreams all the time that I'm at a pool and the deep end suddenly becomes 35 feet deep. Realistically I know that even Shamu's tank at Sea World isn't that deep, but it still freaaaaaaaaaks me out.

That's all I can think of right now. Lets just hope when I go to my sisters graduation some homeless man doesn't chase a pigeon over my head while I'm walking across a grate in the sidewalk as some lady is sitting on a bench getting ready to shove her mammory gland in her baby's face.